Who You Are, Not Who You Were.

flyer for the art show, and Virgina and I late one night at the loft. photo by her man, Mr. St. Clair

This weekend Virgine hosted and artshow at her gallery "Chinatown in a Chinatown Gallery." I love when Virgine hosts an art show, not just because of all the fantastic people that come to her shows, but also for the fact that the party takes place next door.
All I have to do to get to it is walk up to the roof, crossover half way, and walk down the stairs to the art show below.

There is always a mixture of people from around the world, and of course there is always a heavy dose of the French language wafting through the gallery.

The conversations are always stimulating, and everybody looks great. She serves Absinthe, Chinatown pastries, and grapes and we walk around looking at the newest installations.

I went out six days out of seven this week, as well as working out at the gym every other day. I met with my trainer on Sunday.

He put me on the trade mill- and made me run...
I don't run.

"We have to get your heart rate to 168!" "Come on Maya! You can do it."

"I hate you..." I said, trying to break a smile, and trying not to fall on my face.

"If you want Hally Berry's body then you got work as hard as she does..." He said, clip board in hand.

For the first time in my life, I am not scared of working hard at working out. I go to the gym 4-5 times a week now. I watch what I eat, and I like seeing the changes on my body.

As I showered at the gym, I was thinking about tours I would like to organize, people I would like to manage, and festivals I would like to throw. I thought, "F*ck, I am a business women. When did this happen?"

I have always thought of myself as a creative person, and that business was the annoying side that I just had to deal with to pay the bills; but the ugly truth is- I like it...and sometimes, I even love it. I love producing, I love dreaming up an idea and making it come true; because to be a good or even great producer, you have to be the ultimate dreamer, you have to believe in your project and more importantly, you have to make other people believe in it. Convincing them that what you see in it- is worth it, even if they don't see it at that moment. I like that I can multi-task, take charge, and that people not only listen to me, but they also take me seriously.

As I walked home from the gym, I talked to Kev on the phone. He has become such a valuable friend, and really he feels like a colleague.

"You know Kev, I am thinking that I just have to accept that this is who I am now. You have to be who you are, and not who you were. You know what I mean?"

Kev laughed, "Yeah, I know what you mean."

I decided to go out that night by myself to write, and too outline specific projects I wanted to work on for Agent M. I went to a coffee shop, unfortunately they were closing within minutes of me getting there. So I went to my favorite bar across the street.

I was only by myself for a few moments before two beautiful Latina women sat next to me. We introduced ourselves, drank margaritas, talked loudly, and laughed alot. We were there for hours, each of us gave Jonah the bartender (yay! he's back!) a kiss on lips before we left, and exchanged numbers...

This is just one of the reasons I love NY. You can't be afraid to go out there on your own (which years ago, I would have been) because you never know the amazing people you are going to meet doing so.